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Boy House

By Jordan Godby


"Boys live here.

Boys that drink Dr. Pepper Cream Soda

And leave the cans all over the place.

Boys that are too lazy to hang up the paintings

They said they would about two and a half months ago.

Boys that steal signs from work and slap

Homo-erotic, communist Garfield stickers on them

And say, “lets hang that over the fireplace.”

Boys that leave their guitar sitting face down on the loveseat

And put anime action figures up on their mantle.

They have an old Doritos ad display,

Red, loud, and Blue,

As the statement piece of their living room.

These boys greet each other by saying,

“What’s up big sexy?” and reply with

“Nothing, you dumb little slut.”

And then they give each other the finger

With both hands and laugh.

They make pizza from scratch without measuring cups

Because all they have is a tablespoon

And that’s good enough.

Sometimes they fall in a rut

And leave the dishes in the sink for over a week,

But the house is pretty clean for what it’s worth.

These boys are currently looking

For a 9x12 foot area rug, preferably red and blue

And ugly (to match the Doritos display of course),

For their living room.

If you know where to find one like that,

And cheap, call them at

(815) 383-xxxx because

They aren’t having much luck."


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